• What girls say: I'm fine
  • What girls mean: I'm too embarrassed to ask for water from your mom because this is the first time I've been over and she's asked me like 500 times if I wanted any and I've been saying no but I'm dying of thirst

hotwhiteguy:

the perks of being a flower wall

hotwhiteguy:

the perks of being a flower wall


pleatedjeans:

via

pleatedjeans:

via



hotwhiteguy:

my chopsticks know i’m white

hotwhiteguy:

my chopsticks know i’m white


gaimez:

One time this girl really hated me and wanted to ruin my reputation or something so one day i was talking to a boy and she came up and really obnoxiously said “you know she has a crush on you right?” and he was like “man i hope so or else this is gonna get really awkward”

She fuckin told my boyfriend that i liked him


unamusedsloth:

The new Godzilla movie had a lower budget than expected.

unamusedsloth:

The new Godzilla movie had a lower budget than expected.


xionin:

Nominee for best dad ever.


meatbicyclevevo:

meatbicyclevevo:

What’s the definition of a will?

Come on guys it’s a dead giveaway


giveamanagame:

captainjamestklrk:

MY BIRD IS SITTING IN THE TOP CORNER OF HER CAGE CALLING MY DOG’S NAME AND ASKING IF HE WANTS A TREAT AND IF HE WANTS TO GO TO OUTSIDE AND HE’S TOO STUPID TO REALIZE IT’S HER SO EVERYTIME SHE SAYS SOMETHING HE LOOKS AT ME LIKE

image 

SHE LAUGHS EVERYTIME TOO AND NOW HE’S JUMPING ON ME AND BARKING AND GETTING MAD AT ME LIKE OLIVER TURN AROUND AND LOOK IN THAT HUGE ASS CAGE AND BEG HER FOR A FUCKING TREAT OR SOMETHING. 

your bird is an asshole


stitch-the-geek:

OMG GUYS THAT WAS ONE TIME


hobolunchbox:

When I first heard a Lego movie was coming out, I pretty much imagined this.

hobolunchbox:

When I first heard a Lego movie was coming out, I pretty much imagined this.



dreamingofcossackia:

live to ride

dreamingofcossackia:

live to ride


abitsmartassy:

this is the greatest headline i have ever seen

abitsmartassy:

this is the greatest headline i have ever seen